Saturday, July 30, 2011

Just One of Those Days

Momma said there would be days like this....it's just one of those days that I'm feeling a certain kind of way. I went out for a bit to take care of some business that appears more complicated than useful to setup. On my way home, I ran by Barnes and Noble and sat there reading my Nook for about an hour. It felt great to get out in the world and just be. On the way home I sat at the light and tears ran down my face. It probably didn't help that I'd just read half of the Jaycee Dugard book. Just one of those things where in the blink of an eye or through the course of a day your life can change. I sat there thinking about life a year ago, those lovely carefree summer days and I fast forwarded to now, isolated and carefully planned out days and I had my "Yes how quickly things can change" moment. But my faith remains in the fact that the Lord is shouldering all that concerns me and he's working out every aspect of Reya's recovery. I gauge where we'll be one year from today and I'm saying 'Thank You' Lord for the expected end. 'Thank You' that our steps are ordered and in all we must endure you are in the midst and working it out.

Our appt at Hemoc yesterday only took 4.5 hours. The Drs. are slightly concerned by the rollercoaster ride Mireya's white count is taking. They've ordered a test that will give us an idea of the cellular make up and hopefully give them an idea of what's going on. In the meantime she got a dose of 'LMNOP' (GCSF) to try to boost her white cell count.

I'm working on getting out of this funk. As I look around me and see these little smiling faces, I can't dwell in this place long. Celebrating life, celebrating wellness and celebrating God's grace and love.

2 comments:

  1. Sometimes nothing feels better than a very good ugly cry. I think you have earned it. Thinking about you guys and praying for a return to some amount of "normal" for you guys. You so deserve that. Hugs!

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  2. Isn't that the truth. Thank you for the love and prayers. It means a lot.

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