Thankful

 Gone are the days of being consumed with a life solely driven by treatment and all it entails.  Today we are enjoying living life in a new way (the difference a year makes).  Everyone is healthy and happy and there is so much we are grateful and thankful for!  My prayer is that everyone take a moment to truly understand how fortunate and blessed we are despite it all.  There are many things that have the ability to steal our joy if we allow it. 'Choose' to maintain a positive disposition regardless of the circumstance or situation. Make someones day and change how you feel about yours!  Look for ways you could bless others today...a smile, a phone call, a hug, a encouraging word, a meal, a dollar, your time...the list goes on and on.

Take time to reflect on the positive and move past the negative to reposition yourself and help others. Wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving!  Love and blessings to you all!

Happy New Year

It's the new year.....out with the old and in with the new (or improved). The beginning of a new year is also a time of reflection and one to set or realign goals.  There are so many things I'm looking forward to this year.

This year I expect and am looking forward to Mireya's health being restored 100%. I'm trusting and believing for the health and prognosis of the many families whose lives have been turned upside down over the last year by diagnosis and treatment. It's a difficult space to manage. Maintaining sanity and balance in the midst of treatments, tests, and scans is rough....feeling your emotions, but trying not to feed them is also a challenge.  Faith and prayers makes the difference.  I truly don't know where we'd be without the prayers of so many covering us.Nothing can separate us from the love of God.  His presence is his promise (Romans 8:38-39).  

We're looking forward to a semblance of normalcy being re-infused in our lives. I can't wait for the day Mireya gets her Hickman line removed and she can take a bath in more than a few inches of water, jump in a pool or ride some waves at the beach. I can't wait to see her rejoin dance classes (she LOVES to dance) or the day she will actually be able to attend school in her Kindergarten classroom. Joyous, yet tearful moments because these are simple pleasures we have not enjoyed for almost two years now.

Going camping with my Jalen and cheering from the stands at his first basketball game are going to be highlights this year. Starting an annual Mother/Daughter trip with Paris is on my list of things to do. This will be something large or small, we can look forward to doing each year. My little grasshopper Makinley is ready to take on her own activities too. She can't decide if it will be dance, gymnastics or karate, so for the moment she twirls, flips and has a mean roundhouse kick.

Being a good parent starts with being a happy and fulfilled person. Personally, I plan to take advantage of opportunities and avenues I've avoided or put off. I will also be investing some of my time this year to brushing up on my Spanish. I used to speak Spanish quite fluently, but I've forgotten a lot and definitely need to practice. I'm looking forward to reconnecting with friends near and far. Being the best person and Mommy I can be is important to me. I've learned to take very little for granted and I strive to meet each day with a positive attitude and a thankful heart. Thank you for your kind words, thoughts and prayers....they keep us lifted.

Excited about 2013.....

Color Run Fun

My big girl had some fun in RVA this weekend at the Color Run, dubbed the Happiest 5K on the Planet.  After visiting the website and seeing all the awesome pictures taken, I definitely want to participate in this event when it comes back to town or close by.

The Color Run benefits a local charity in each city where it is held. This year the selected charity was Church Hill Activities and Tutoring (CHAT). CHAT creates and sustains intentional communities that are dedicated to transforming the lives of at-risk youth in Church Hill by equipping them to rebuild the city through academic instruction, character development, life skills training, job-readiness and internship programs, and health and wellness activities. Visit their website at www.chatrichmond.org.

I didn't get to spend a lot of time with Paris while she was here.  I'm totally OCD about germs and infections, so she and her crew stayed at her Dad's. It's funny how your kids come home and have agendas and so many 'things' going on, but I had to see my girls face and wrap my arms around her before she left.  I loved the few moments I had to spend with Paris and the LC girlies. That actually goes down as the quickest visit to date, 00:30:00.

I realize this stage and phase of life for Paris, is going and growing but I'm so glad we are able to talk, Skpe, and Factime several times throughout the week.  It allows us to connect, remain abreast of the happenings and affirm our relationship in a new way.  I'm looking forward to kicking Aplastic Anemia and treatment to the side and living freer, doing more and not missing out on things I/we would normally be doing.  Right now in this season of our lives, caring for Reya and guarding/protecting her from any and all things that could prove harmful is our top priority.

I love you pare, paulap, apari, pipi....my heart, my sweet girl and original road dog.

Oh Brother

Our dear wonderful brother, we love walking you to the bus stop in the morning.  We cry and are sad when you leave.  Somewhere between walking back home and crossing the threshold of the doorway our minds are in the zone....The Girl Zone!

As you are putting your lunch box and backpack away, we are putting on Princess dresses and picking the Princess movie of the day. Monday - Snow White, Tuesday - Tangled, Wednesday - Cinderella, Thursday- Aladdin, Friday - Princess and the Frog or something like that.  You have one resource period a day, while we're certain to incorporate reading, music and art on any given day.

There's snack time, lunch time and the 'often resisted' nap time. I know your glad you did away with those long ago. By the time we wake up it's time for our second favorite time of the day, walking to the bus stop to pick you up.  We love that your not to cool to get of the bus with smiles and hugs us.  Hearing all the things you learned and did are fascinating, and we can't wait until we are old enough to ride the bus to school.

For now we'll enjoy hearing all about the adventures of school and we'll keep our fun times and adventures between the us.  What happens at home while your away, stays at home even when you come back.  There are days you are sad because you have to go to school and will miss us, or maybe it's because you think your 'missing' out on all the fun at home.  We won't ever admit, you are! Welcome home oh dear wonderful brother.  The Girl Zone is definitely over when you arrive.  We can now look forward to watching 'Walking with Beasts', playing Dinosaurs and Princesses or having you chase us around on all fours like an indricothere or hyenadon.  Big Brothers Rock!        

Life Threatening & Life Loss

 A life threatening illness and/or it's diagnosis will instantly throw your life into a tail spin.  Week in and week out, I see so many lives that have been altered by aplastic anemia, sickle cell anemia, leukemia, hodgkin's lymphoma, neuroblastoma and other childhood cancers and blood diseases.  I see very innocent, yet courageous, kids who are fighting for their lives and parents that are doing all they can to take care of them, provide the best medical care they can and give them some semblance of normalcy.

I love Mireya and I know we are blessed.  I believe with everything in me she is cured and we will continue to reach milestones and take strides over hurdles until we reach the end of this race victorious.  I spent most of the night crying my eyes out as I learned through little Emily's Mom of two little angels that lost their battles this week to cancer.  One is a beautiful ten-year old girl named Faith, who like Mireya, loved all things princess and was also dubbed a 'Warrior Princess'.  The other, an adorable five-year old girl named Gabby who just after three short months passed away from brain cancer.  I don't know either of these families but my heart is broken for them.  I can tell from their pages and sites that these precious little lives have touched and reached many.  I didn't get much sleep and I've been consumed by the pain I know these families are going through.

There is nothing that prepares you for the diagnosis of a life threatening illness and certainly not for the loss of your child.  Hug your child(ren) tight, tell them you love them and cherish every moment you have with them.  The good ones, the bad ones, the ugly ones and everything in between, regardless of their age.  Make those wrongs right.  Tomorrow is not promised.  My personal prayer is that everyone know Christ as their personal savior because outside of the life we are not promised on earth, we are promised eternal life with Christ.  It's a simple confession.

Lord Jesus, I believe You are the Christ, the Son of the living God and that You died on the cross for my sin. You say in Your word that if I confess my sins and ask forgiveness, You are faithful and will forgive my sins and remember them no more.  You will not hold them against me and You will give me everlasting life. Come into my heart, I receive You now and make you the Lord of my life.  I thank You for the blood You shed on the cross just for me.  In Jesus name, Amen  

If you said that prayer, it's a blessed assurance!  If you're not at a place to do so or you don't have full understanding of what it is to be a Christian and have a relationship with Christ, I encourage you to get connected. I'm not the officiant on Christianity, but I am counted in that number and I love the Lord with all my heart, soul and strength. I don't know where I would be without him in my life.  I don't know how I would have endured all that has transpired in our lives this year without Christ in my life.  There is so much more I could go into here, but let's keep it simple and to the point. My heart has been so heavy.  I don't take this lightly, it is extremely important to me.  We all have faults and no one is perfect.  We miss it some times, but God forgives us.  He extends his grace and mercy to us beyond what we deserve, but that's the kind of God he is. God is love and I strive every day of my life to share and extend love to others and in turn I have been so fortunate to be on the receiving end of God's love for me and my family exhibited through the hearts and kindness of so many.

My heart goes out to these two families who have lost their precious little girls.  My thoughts and prayers are with them as they find the strength to endure this.  Live your life intentionally, let go of things that, in the grand scheme, just don't matter!  Don't sweat the small stuff, be thankful and give thanks for your life and the lives of those you care for so dearly.  Smile (your on Candid Camera), be kind, show love and most of all, have compassion for others because you never know what someone else is going through.  You have the power to make a difference!

Visiting the Isolated & Shut In

We've had a few really fun visits over the last week.  Our friends the Woods are in town and it goes without saying that we will find our way together before they hit the road.  Rebound and recovery did not stop the visit this go around.  Technically we did see one another, but so much is going on in both our lives, we just needed to connect and catch up.  

Derek has been one of Mireya's favorite people every since she was a baby.  Reya would allow very few people to hold her, but Derek was one that she would always open her arms to.  They had a very special bond, but haven't seen each other in such a long time.  Well time and distance didn't diminish that connection. Within no time they were connected at the hip, which little Ms. Nadia was not amused by in the least. There is always lots of smiles, laughter and comedy when we get together.  We miss having them here.   The parameters of the Military Life have seemingly changed, or perhaps it's just that I was not all up in the flow since I was just the military brat (i say that affectionately).  We are praying and believing for God's best as they prepare for the next phase of life in the military.  They joined us for the dance par-tay and the girls have inducted a new princess to the crew...little Ms. Nadia.  We had such a great time hanging out with them. 

We also got to hang out with our friends the Yangsters.  Our kids love, love, love getting together. The summer has gone by and we've only seen each other a handful of times. We grabbed their favorite chinese noodles (lo mein) and hung out for the afternoon until sweet baby girl Quinn was ready to nap.  Jalen and Tien were fully engaged.  They both love all things Star Wars and Legos so they had plenty to keep them occupied.   I don't know who was happier me or the kids.  Care and I sat and chatted.  We laughed, we cried and I got two baskets of laundry folded.  Now that's productivity!  It was so great to see Reya and Mays play.  She loved every minute of it and I loved that she actually had 'play time' with one of her friends. We've been so guarded with visits (rightfully so), it was so good to make arrangements for this time, mask, sanitizer and all. 

Zone D

A few weeks ago my Mom came up with a great, inexpensive way we could allow Reya to be outdoors a bit more without the ill effects of direct sunlight and heat. One thing about us is when we have an idea, it's on until the mission is accomplished. When I was in Jr. High School (shout out to all my Curundu peeps) our buildings were alphabetical A, B, C, D, F and our Cafetorium. Well the Bolton's now have what I'll dub 'Zone D'. A deluxe screened Gazebo that has become our place to hang out during the day and most nights without getting eaten up by mosquitoes or burning down the deck with a bazillion citronella candles trying to avoid getting eaten up by mosquitoes.

It has been awesome. The first day we put it up Reya played outside for a few hours (have doll house will travel outdoors). We've been really enjoying it. Our original plans to watch Rio under the stars were sidelined due to rain, so last night we had our re-premiere of Rio in our 'outside house' as Makinley calls it. It was fun. I fell asleep amongst the bean bags and children piled all over and around me. Today we did art out there. The kids had a blast. Just to be outside, feeling the warmth (but not full on heat) is so nice. It's also a 'controlled' area of play for Jalen. If it were up to him he'd be like most of us were as kids outside playing all day here, there and everywhere. Unfortunately we live in a much different world today. He enjoys that he's outside and I enjoy that I know exactly where he is and he's not feeling so holed up. It's time for another 'Track Night'. I think everyone is having a little four-wall a phobia or itis, so a change of scenery in the next few nights will be good.

The other thing I love about this gazebo is that we can roll it up and put it back in its bag. As a kid I went camping most every summer and I've been itching to go as a family for a few years. The main concern I have is there is so much I'm not comfortable with. When I went camping as a kid there were adults 'responsible' for me and the excursion, if we go as a family then I'm responsible for it all (yikes). My friend Erin and her family camp a lot and she has been encouraging me. I'm sure we'll eventually try it (remember at some point the missions always get accomplished), so surely this gazebo is something good to have in our arsenal. Maybe for the Bolton's Great Outdoors Adventure (sans the Chevy Chase or John Candy visual)?

Lights, Camera and Love in Action

#TeamBolton has been featured in Mexico Restuarant commericals, Real Simple Magazine and selected for the launch of 'Momtourage' by iVillage. None of those features compare or have the heart and compassion behind the NBC Channel -12 On Your Side 'Act of Kindness' segment.

I shared last week how our friend, Frazelle Hampton nominated us for this reward. We had no idea what the completed piece would entail, but we tuned in at 5pm and watched everything from new laws on concussions, house fire disputes and the plague of ragweed that is affecting so many people right now. At the end of the 'First News' segment we watched our blessing unfold. We are so humbled by the outpouring of love, support and prayers by so many. People we know, many we don't know, but God knows and he has heard our prayers and is working this out on our behalf. Mireya's health is increasing everyday. We've seen more life and spirit in her than we have for months. That in itself is a blessing beyond words. It's incredible to see illness fading and life reemerging. Life is so precious. It's so easy to say those words, but to live them adds depth and a meaning that is indescribable.

Thank you to our families, our friends, our church family, friends of friends who have reached out to be a blessing, who have prayed and stood in this gap for us as we've gone through one of the toughest things we had to endure. In every obstacle, challenge and circumstance God has shown himself mighty and true to his word. Has it been a struggle at times? Absolutely, but he's given us a peace and a hope to keep pressing. I've said this many times before God continues to show us how much he loves us through the love, support and generosity of others. We stand in awe of his goodness and say 'thank you'. No longer feeling undeserving, but knowing that God can do all things and that he will use people to fulfill what needs to be done. We've had to learn to be better 'receivers'. We're humbled and grateful for it all.

If your not in the Central Virginia area, I've included a link to this incredible instance where love, support and community met last week. It was a wonderful surprise and we thank 'Michael & Son Services' for partnering with NBC 12 and their sponsorship of such a wonderful program. Thank you to Sabrina Squire and Matt Boyce (the Producer), you captured and presented this piece beautifully. Family battles major illness & other challenges - NBC12 News, Weather Sports, Traffic, and Programming Guide for Richmond, VA |

A #TeamBolton Facebook page has also been created. 'Like' the page and join the community to remain connected via FB. The donation page has also been a true blessing to us. Thank you to our friends for maintaining this site on our behalf and to those that have been positioned to be a blessing to us through this site. www.gofundme.com/mireyas-miracle.

Love and blessings to you all.

Love Will Find A Way

Amy Grant, Pablo Cruise, and even Lion King II had a cute little spin on this sentiment. Remaining connected can feel like a tall task when your running around like a nurse without a degree, who knows enough to be qualified and dangerous, as you prepare to send your first born off to college in less than 8 days, all while managing the pace of things inside a diagnosis that has turned your life upside down.

I'm doing good on any given day that I know my name, what day it is and how many children I have. Everything else I just roll with. Recently someone shared how they wanted to do something really special for Quentin and I because we've been operating like ships just passing in the night. Trust me it starts to feel like 'tag your it' and that our roles just shift to either 'care at the hospital' or 'care at home' with life thrown on top. We're all so happy to finally be at home together and settling into our new routine.

It is important in the midst of all this to find a way to remain connected as best we can, and if possible incorporate time for ourselves. Time for me could be so many things. Quentin enjoys playing basketball. He's been able to enjoy an Open Gym night with a friend of ours at his church. I remember when he and I used to get together with a group of guys from work (and an occasional girl) for a few hours of open gym play. Whew, that was when we were 'younger in love' and the knees could handle all that. And trust me those guys took NO pity on me. It was actually like they played harder against me for having the audacity to come out there, but it was all good. These days we just pull the cars out of the driveway and hoop it up. Momma's got a mean jump shot and Daddy's got a killer crossover. We talk a little bit of junk, d'ing each other up and matching each others shots. On a few occasions the neighborhood kids have gathered to get in on it. That's when we have to team up and show them what we're working with. #TeamBolton in a whole other arena. Yet I digress, I'm having a 'those were the days' Archie and Edith Bunker moment...yikes.

We may be a little off our game due to the parameters of our situation, but we do all we can to remain connected. Dinner together, making time to talk about life, love and things other than counts, appointments and Aplastic Anemia. Sometimes it's taking a walk and enjoying the splendor of everything around us or catching up on our Tivo'd shows. It's a chance to laugh at all the foolishness of reality tv which adds a sense of calm to our own lives. Our sleep cycles have been disrupted and often it feels like we're scrambling for time to do all we could not do during the day at night, but nothing feels better than actually sleeping in the same bed with the man I love! Some nights Mireya has a hard time resting without one of us nearby. Somehow she's got it twisted and thinks Mommy or Daddy are 'her' sleeping partners, although she did have one of us with her every night for almost 60 days straight. Someone mentioned a few weeks ago that they had the idea of taking care of the kids while Quentin and I go to a hotel and just rest. Sounded like a great proposal. Sleep is not overrated, but a hot commodity around here, and eventually we'll get caught up.

It's funny to see how the kids are meshing their worlds to be together. The girls have been solidly playing trains with Jalen. There's a version of Princesses and Dinosaurs, Walking with Beasts and Princesses, Lego Mania and the now infamous 'can we have a sleepover' question 'every' night of the week. They just want to be together as if they are making up for all the days and nights they were apart. We try to do what we can to make our family time meaningful and fun. We want everyone to feel included and loved despite how our lives have been changed. It's important that even though Mireya's getting a lot of attention and a lot of focus is being placed on her that they each know they are special and that we find ways to affirm that with each of them. It's not always easy, and yes we're tired, but it's worth it.

We'll be married 12 years in just a few days and I love this man more than I did even 1 year ago. There's something about the confidence in knowing who you are to one another that your love can be mutually expressed without words. Don't get it twisted, you still have to profess your love, and do things you enjoy together, but also create those new things that show how crazy you still are for one another after all this time, after the kids, after the challenges of life. In the end your still happy and blessed to look in the eyes of the one person who loves you with hair, without hair, skinny as the modeling days or hitting and holding with a few extra lbs per kid. That voice of love, support, reason, and encouragement. Even though we are faced with a demanding situation that is in a very monotonous and regimented stage, we have to make our relationship a priority. We are a reflection of God's love.

We will look back at this time (hopefully from a beautiful and luxurious island) and laugh, and reflect on the goodness of God and what it looks like to come out on the other side with your sanity, with laughter (we get hysterical over here), and holding the hand of the man you still feel so blessed to be married too. I couldn't see myself walking through this with anyone else. Love makes a way!

Ever Evolving World of Progress

Reya's appointment today only lasted 3.5 hours. Her counts came up a bit since Friday but her white count is still lagging along with her magnesium. The dosage on one of her anti-rejection medications has been changed. Sometimes when this medication is given at certain levels, it can be prohibitive to the white count. Hopefully we'll begin to see her white count increase a bit more.

A Medical Student started on the floor today shadowing our Physician. Mireya was his first pediatric patient and he was given the task of a full physical and exam. We were on our second run of Barbie's 'The Nutcracker' and I wanted to bang my head against the wall in dread. We've watched this movie at every appointment over the last week for a total of 5 times x 1.5 hours (give me strength). We had time to burn waiting for our lab results and it was a welcome change of pace and entertainment. Now you only get to pull the 'this is my first day, first patient' card once, but, we finally got through it and overall he did a good job and had excellent bedside mannerisms. I think he'll do great.

Reya's platelets have started to increase which is awesome. They've not been higher than about 15k on their own, so we're doing a little Arsenio Hall fist pump over here @ 31k. It will really be great when all three counts are on the rise unassisted by transfusions or medication.

One of our new favorite times of the day is 7pm. That kicks off the Bolton Evening Part-tay on the deck. It's time to light the citronella, get the bubbles machine blowing and kick up the tunes and just chill out. Last night we sat out there well into the night and shut it down with a Family Salsa dance. Jalen and I have decided we'll be hitting the town for a Mother/Son Dance. The kids love to dance and we are known to have dance parties all throughout the week, but they think it's really cool to dance at night under the stars with 'fire' all around us. It's the simple things....continuing not to sweat the small stuff and savoring these moments together.